Tuesday, July 18, 2006
The Uzbek Promise
In Uzbekistan, after a while, you learn that when people say they’ll do something, they don’t necessarily follow up on it. We affectionately took to calling this the "Uzbek promise," as these promises didn’t really hold much currency and weren’t promises that necessarily would be kept. It was one of the many charms of the east that required some adjustment to by the foreign guest. People didn’t like confrontation, were too polite to say no or refuse you. Often, they simply said “hop” which literally means “OK” -- sort of a yes, but better understood as a maybe or a likely no.
Though this could be frustrating or disappointing when someone didn’t deliver, it was also somewhat refreshing. After all, if everyone else made Uzbek promises, why did you have to live up to a higher standard? After some time, I learned to say I would do something, or go somewhere, but not necessarily intend to do it at all. It was much easier than outright refusing someone, which would most likely lead to disagreement or argument. It was just the culture – and me being culturally sensitive. I figured, no problem disappointing people here, they are used to being disappointed.
So, when I ran into Shukhrat, the attendant from the Piyonerskaya banya on the street and he asked me why I didn’t show up on Sunday, and that a guy Sherzod came looking to meet me because I promised to show up, I just shrugged my shoulders and smiled. I’m sorry, I said. I forgot. No explanation necessary. They said, come next weekend. We’ll be waiting for you. I nodded my head and said "hop," leaving it to them to understand that as they wished. ¶ 7:01 PM
In Uzbekistan, after a while, you learn that when people say they’ll do something, they don’t necessarily follow up on it. We affectionately took to calling this the "Uzbek promise," as these promises didn’t really hold much currency and weren’t promises that necessarily would be kept. It was one of the many charms of the east that required some adjustment to by the foreign guest. People didn’t like confrontation, were too polite to say no or refuse you. Often, they simply said “hop” which literally means “OK” -- sort of a yes, but better understood as a maybe or a likely no.
Though this could be frustrating or disappointing when someone didn’t deliver, it was also somewhat refreshing. After all, if everyone else made Uzbek promises, why did you have to live up to a higher standard? After some time, I learned to say I would do something, or go somewhere, but not necessarily intend to do it at all. It was much easier than outright refusing someone, which would most likely lead to disagreement or argument. It was just the culture – and me being culturally sensitive. I figured, no problem disappointing people here, they are used to being disappointed.
So, when I ran into Shukhrat, the attendant from the Piyonerskaya banya on the street and he asked me why I didn’t show up on Sunday, and that a guy Sherzod came looking to meet me because I promised to show up, I just shrugged my shoulders and smiled. I’m sorry, I said. I forgot. No explanation necessary. They said, come next weekend. We’ll be waiting for you. I nodded my head and said "hop," leaving it to them to understand that as they wished. ¶ 7:01 PM
